change your marriage by changing your expectations….

Resolve expectations about each other’s personalities. Accept the unique person that God made your spouse to be.  Realize that personality differences between the two of you can strengthen your marriage when you figure out how to use them to complement each other.  Don’t judge or criticize each other.  Instead of looking for what you think is wrong about your spouse, notice what’s right.  Ask God to help you love your spouse as he or she actually is, rather than who you want your spouse to be.  Listen well to each other; be humble, gentle, kind, and patient with each other; and forgive each other for mistakes.  If your spouse is struggling to overcome some weaknesses, pray for him or her, but understand that God alone can empower your spouse to change.  You can’t change your spouse, so don’t waste time or energy trying.  Instead, focus on changing yourself to live as faithfully as you can to God’s calling for you.

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